gob

GOB


antipornPorn, and masturbating to it, is so widespread it’s considered basically  a harmless vice. Right?  Maybe not.  Maayan and Lauren had their assumptions checked by the lovely and insightful Jeff Finley–artist, entrepreneur, fellow podcaster–and someone who’s dabbled in what’s known as the ‘No-Fap’ movement–where people (mostly men) opt to abstain from porn, and, at times, masturbation, to recalibrate their brains and sexuality.  Sounds  prudish?  It’s not.  Listen up and you may rethink some of your…ahem…private habits…

Listen to This: Want Better Sex? STOP Watching Porn (no, really)

We’ve discussed porn before, and basically came to the conclusion that it’s an ‘outdated’ taboo…not worth our shame or condemnation. If it doesn’t hurt anyone, what’s the problem, anyway? Well, aside from the severe misogynistic themes that can run rampant in much of porn, it can actually cause serious physical and mental issues–at least according to YourBrainOnPorn.com.  According to the site, too much porn use can cause:

 

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Uhhhhh…..YIKES???!? We had no idea.  Erectile dysfunction?  Morphing sexuality?  Okay….maybe there’s a case to be made for chilling out on the YouPorn.

 

If you need some more convincing, check out this Ted Talk about the subject:

Basically, surprise, surprise….porn can be as addictive as any pleasure-giving substance out there.  And the constant barrage of novel material thanks to the internet makes modern-day porn all the more powerful and potentially dangerous….not to mention, young men these days have grown up with high-speed internet,  (and smartphones) and  have likely been looking at porn since they were a preteen.  Thus, as Gary Wilson, the speaker in the Ted Talk, says, “Asking a man if he thinks porn has affected his relationship with women is like asking a fish what they think about water.” How could they know?  They know nothing else.

 

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Thus…the ‘No-Fap’ movement–an online community  that developed with the intention of encouraging members (who call themselves ‘Fapstronauts’, which we think is adorkable) to swear off of porn and sometimes masturbation for a spell (the length of time is up to the individual). The benefits of doing this, the site claims,  can include:

  • Recovery from porn-induced sexual dysfunction. Many fapstronauts report that NoFap’s programs have cured erectile dysfunction and delayed ejaculation, along with other sexual issues.

  • Increased self-control. Some fapstronauts do not feel like they have a pornography or masturbation problem. They are here to put their willpower to the test by facing their own instincts to pursue easy sexual arousal or indulge in certain sexual behaviors.

  • More hard-drive space. Some of the larger porn collections we’ve heard about can take up terabytes of information. No more hoarding. Permanently deleting it will free up a lot of hard drive space. As an added bonus, you won’t be hesitant to let people borrow your computer anymore.

  • More time. No more spending hours at the computer looking for that one video to get you off. That time can be better spent pursuing  your passions, bettering your life, and spending time with friends or a significant other. The possibilities are endless.

  • Improved attitude. Many nofappers described increased happiness throughout their lives, especially in their attitudes towards sex and interpersonal relationships.

Jeff Finley, our esteemed guest, has been a part of this community, and was kind enough to give his first-hand experience with taking on these challenges, and why he felt he needed to join the community in the first place. The interest stemmed from a larger effort at personal improvement and spiritual renewal, which he documents in his blog Maker/Mistaker.

He gamely fields our sometimes prying questions with honesty and maturity…a refreshing approach to a topic that so many of us refuse to talk about at all.

 

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Lauren has a PONDEROur culture is obsessed with all things new and novel.  The new movie that’s out. The new books reviewed by the NY Times.  The newest band. The new actress. Things that have been around for awhile are just…not that interesting. Which…sucks, for people who are creating things.  If you don’t catch people’s interest in the first 6 months of launching your project…it’s stale.  Seems unfair. Can we change this?  I doubt it. But it’s good to notice.

Maayan has a RAVE about her awesome new tea kettle. It fits nicely with Lauren’s ponder. It’s old and gorgeous and totally functional. Re-purpose? Yes, please! More on that here.

Jeff joined in as well with a gem of a TIP. He’s changed his life around from depression and malaise to one where he’s doing the things he wants and taking on healthy habits–all thanks to a simple step–waking up earlier than normal.  It’s been so powerful, he’s writing  an upcoming book on the matter. Check it out and make sure to download it when it’s available in 2015!